A quick way to to unwind is to notice that there are moments of okayness.  Not every moment is bad or hectic.   One of my practices was to take a deep breath and say to myself: “in this moment I’m okay”.    Or “in this moment I feel alright”.      

By noticing when I feel lighter, okay, awake, calm, peaceful and DRAWING MY ATTENTION to it, I realised that things weren’t bad all the time.    It gives me a sense of relief!

The more I appreciate the periods of okayness, the longer they get!    
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Take a moment to listen to your thoughts about yourself.
How you feel about your body?
Your state of health?
Do you like the way you look?

Many people would say:
I am too fat, too thin, too short, dumpy, stupid.... and so it goes on.


This week I saw a three minute video about a woman who hated her body.   It struck a chord with me... I realised that I quite often verbally beat myself up!     I want to share this video with you - it's about a woman who chose to look differently about her body. Click here to look at this video (it is a promotional video but the message is well worth hearing).

So often when I work with people, I get a sense that they don't like their body, or the part that is hurting them.   For some it is their hormonal system because they can't conceive a baby, or it makes them moody, or menopausal.   For others it is their "pain in the neck" or "pain in their butt".   I have noticed there is a kind of tension that sits in the body, and it appears when we go on a negative self talk rampage.    Many a client will tell you that during a session I have asked them to breathe deeply and SMILE into their body.   To appreciate it - after all the body still keeps working, even if we have a poor diet, bad posture, don't move enough, laugh enough, play enough.    

This is the analogy I give to my clients about our self talk:
Let us pretend you work in a factory.  You have been there a long time and some of the machinery is a bit unpredictable, which affects your output.      

Boss A comes in.  This person is always grumpy with you, telling you what is wrong, making you feel useless, picking holes in you, yelling sometimes. How do you feel?   Do you shrink down?  Do you dread Boss A? Would you grumble and complain outside of work?  Would you even want to go to work?  And if you had a good idea about how to make things better, would you tell this Boss?   Probably not.

Boss B comes in.   This person really likes you.   They praise you for your work, despite the difficult circumstances you are working in.   They tell you what they appreciate about you, admire you.  How do you feel now?    Stand up tall?  Feel proud and appreciated?  Do you look forward to showing up at work?  Would you be willing to share with this Boss any of your good ideas for improvement?  Yes, because they are likely to be well received.

I believe it is like this with our body.   When we berate it, it shrinks, constricts and gets tense.   When we love and appreciate it, it softens, relaxes, gives us feedback, and tells us what it wants.    

Every cell in the body is connected.   If I were to stamp hard on your toe, every part of your body would know about it, right?   So it only stands to reason that when we are internally beating ourselves up, the body responds.

I have noticed that when I really care and speak highly about my body to my body, a type of new wiring happens.   I get ideas how to look after it, I make different choices about my health and activities.   

How do we love our bodies?:
1.  Talk to it in a loving/caring manner (even if it hurts)
2.  Ask it to tell you what it needs and imagine getting wired up - painful body part to the brain - so that the information/inspiration can come to you on how to help it
3.  To consciously do caring things for your body... have a bath, do a relaxation exercise, take a walk, have a nourishing meal.

To download a FREE audio on the Inner Smile Visualisation click here.

Click here for my Women's Rejuvenation Chi Kung Class this Saturday.

If you are a woman, dealing with moods are part of your life.   

Our hormonal cycle, health of our organs, stress levels, past experiences and
state of mind all have an impact upon our moods. Being  able to experience the highs and lows of life can be quite a ride. Emotions are  part of being human and make up the tapestry of life.   There are times when it is appropriate to be angry, it moves us towards making positive change in our lives.   Other times its okay to be sad - grief is a natural process of letting go.  But sometimes we get stuck, and this "stuckness" can stay with us for years.  Unresolved issues of the past
takes away our enjoyment of the present moment.   
 
Prolonged moods, such as depression, anxiety, fear or anger can affect the chemistry of our body.  Once our chemistry is out of balance it then feeds into accentuating our moods.  Likewise, if our chemistry is out of balance through poor diet, alcohol and drug use, then our emotions will be affected.

What helps our moods:-

Firstly we need to balance the chemistry in our bodies.   A healthy diet  (avoid alcohol), along with herbs which calm our emotions, tone the organs and balance the hormones.  Very often if we experience prolonged stress our adrenal glands become exhausted.   Licorice tea acts as an adrenal gland tonic (not to be used with high blood pressure).Calm the mind.    This could be through meditating, using visualisations, deep breathing practice, or doing an ascetic activity that requires your concentration i.e. gardening, painting, sewing or dancing.

Deal with the issues.     If you have problems or work, suffer from long term grief or anxiety, feel constant fear - get help.    Sometimes all we need is a trained listening ear to unravel how we feel and some new skills for dealing with feelings when they
arise.

Learn Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT).   We are always going to have issues and feelings coming up.  So why not learn a tool which you can use whenever you want to deal with them? This is a marvellous skill which can shift negative feelings very quickly.  
Love yourself.    Often our health and well-being is out of balance just because we beat ourselves up with our words and thoughts!    Imagine if you were an employee doing the best job you could and your employer said you were no good.  How would you feel?    Crushed...Deflated....Discouraged.      Now imagine if that employer said you were "awesome".   Would you feel Excited...Enthusiastic...Keen....Proud?  In chi kung we use a practice called The Inner Smile where we send loving thoughts to our inner self and develop self love.  Its simple and easy to do.

Learn how to breathe.    Put a hand on your chest and one on your tummy and take a breath.   How do you breathe?  In the upper chest or tummy?  Do you breathe shallow or deep?   Rapid shallow upper chest breathing causes anxiety.  Slow deep tummy breathing causes relaxation.  Our breath is related to our nervous system.

Transform your emotions.     There is an ancient practice I use called The Six Healing Sounds.    It uses movement, sound and colour to transform negative emotions into positive ones.  Let us say our body is like a garden in which plants grow.  The
weeds are like negative emotions and the vegetables are like the positive ones (virtues).    Like weeds, negative emotions contain energy and nutrients, and if we compost them in the garden, then the energy and nutrients from the weeds can be used to enable the vegetables to grow.     Likewise when we use the Six Healing Sounds, a composting of emotions happens and good feelings/virtues are able to  develop.

If you want to transform your moods, why not try my Women's Chi Kung class starting this Thursday? 

My chi kung teacher, Gabrielle is coming to Nelson to teach 4-7 July.    She has many years experience and has learnt directly from Mantak Chia - a Taoist Master living in Thailand.    I want to invite you to two different events:
1.   An Introductory night on Thursday 4th July (donation only) where Gabrielle will lead our Women's Chi Kung class.   This is a unique opportunity to experience Chi Kung.  For further details and testimonials click here

2.  The Tao of Healing Love weekend course 5-7 July in Marahau.   For further information click here

Here is Gabrielle’s experience of these ancient practices:   “More than 30 years ago I attended my first Healing Tao workshop. I was on a spiritual path, but had so many health issues.  I practiced Yoga for years, but it didn’t improve my immune system. I was looking for answers - how to move in
my life - and I didn’t expect working with my sexual energy will be the key!

I learnt the sexual energy massage as a preparation for a meditation and was amazed by the outcome.  
Massaging the breasts (on top of my clothing) and the lower abdomen whilst connecting with an inner smile, changed the chemistry of my body.  After the sexual energy massage came a healing meditation.
My mind was quiet effortlessly!  It was easy to sit in silence and just observe what the massage had
created. 15 minutes practice per day already can shift our vitality. 

I am not someone who does an exercise, because it is good for me. I do need a motivation, and this Tao
practice holds this promise. Before I started the practice, I had premenstrual symptoms and pain during the menstruation.   When I learnt the practice, I continued to do it once a day for 10 - 30 minutes.
When the next cycle came, the symptoms were already much less. I was amazed from the outcome and within 3 months they disappeared completely. Minimum effort made a great result”.  
  
This is Elayne's personal experience of the Tao of Healing Love:
 “This is a system designed to cultivate my energy (chi), good health, foster self-love, and grow spiritually. It has had a huge impact upon my life, and I love to teach it! The Tao of Healing Love teaches us how to awaken and combine our sexual energy with our heart energy, and use it for health and longevity. I liked it because it was practical and I could actually experience the benefits of doing the practice. It helped me immensely in my private practice as a healer/masseuse, as well as in my personal/intimate life. The course sets out a way of working with our sexuality on our own, and then how to use the practices with another person. The self cultivation helps balance hormones, balance the sex drive (too little or too much), increases vitality, helps process emotions which come up when you fall in love and brings about deeper connection when you are with a partner.    What I personally have observed since doing these practices are as follows:    

1.  I am more steady emotionally and less affected by other people’s emotions.   The Inner Smile has helped me to love myself and puts me in touch with my body
2.  My sex drive balanced out
3.  I have a sexual/heart practice to use during periods of celibacy which gives me health and vitality
4.  My breasts are healthier, with less pre-menstrual breast lumps.  They are also more sensitive
and responsive to touch.
5.  It has helped me grow spiritually by loosening blockages and teaching me through the wisdom which arises from my inner knowing
6.  When I have a deep connection with a client in a massage session, I stay centered through the practice of circulating my energy in the Microcosmic Orbit
7.  It has helped me open up as a healer:  I am able to send more chi/energy to assist my client’s healing process
8.  I am more sensitive to my clients’ emotions because I am more aware of my own through the Six
Healing Sounds
9.  I have more vitality and stay well
10.  I have techniques which I can use to sleep better, to quiet my mind, to release stress, to balance my hormones and clear my energy field.